I ventured over to Youtube and re-visited this classic rock staple:  Marshall Tucker Band’s ‘Can’t You See’ [scroll down for video].  If you’ve ever been in bars, you’ve probably heard this song at some point — playing as background fodder as some macho men try to bang anonymous chicks and/or shed tears in their beers.

Anyway, that’s the image I got when reading this comment on the video:  “if you dislike this, you probably wear skinny jeans and have girlfriend Issues. Grow a beard and act like a man, pussy. #DrainTheSwamp”

My first thought was “Oh, shit!  Alpha male alert!  Alpha male alert!”  Indeed, I can imagine some 8 foot 9, bearded alcoholic ready to smash a pool cue over some nerd who doesn’t know his Marshall Tucker!

That being said, it should be noted that, as a simple matter of fact, not all men are capable of growing full-on, bushy, glorious, bin Laden-esque beards.  Also, one wonders exactly what “acting like a man entails.”  Listening to Marshall Tucker Band?

I actually don’t hate the song, but I honestly find the Crucifucks to be more macho, and their lead singer had a non-macho voice.  But I assure you, you didn’t play in a 1980s hardcore punk band called The Crucifucks while being a huge “pussy.”  You might have been a lot of things, but a pussy was not one of them.  Have you ever seen footage of one of those shows?  On average, they were probably a wilder, more bad-ass type of show than the average Marshall Tucker or Lynyrd Skynyrd affair.

But I digress.  Now, if you’ll excuse me, I feel renewed pressure to find some minoxidil for beard growth.

Advertisements